KU Avoidance of Conflicts Discussion

Reply to Genesis post:

Developing the courage to face the emotional fear and stress inherent in the dynamics of conflict is gained through experiences in which managing disagreements is supported and encouraged (Eilerman, 2006). Due to these dynamics, where addressing conflict might be avoided, for the most part, people tend to develop an unconscious avoidance of conflicts until it becomes part of their regular behavior. Having an avoidance conflict style means that someone deliberately ignores or withdraws from a conflict rather than face it (Amelie, 2022). Depending on the circumstances it can be better to delay an immediate confrontation to avoid creating a bigger issue because of the emotions of the moment. A conflict can be avoided if the person considers that they need time to process, because they do not feel ready to face the issue at that moment or they rather wait for someone else to address it. I think it is important to consider that we all process things differently and, for some people, rushing to address a problem is preferable and it comes easier, while for others they prefer to wait until the time is right to have a proper discussion about the conflict. 

Unfortunately, avoiding a conflict does not make it go away. In the contrary it can causeto build up frustration and negative feelings that can end up negatively affecting your relationship and your whole health. Research has shown that introverts are more likely to avoid conflict since they are inclined to observe a situation and “hold in” their thoughts and feelings unless it is very meaningful to them. (Eilerman,2006). Since I was little, I have learned things that were not supposed to be talked about out loud in my family. Somehow, we all have this agreement that there is a topic that we should just avoid avoiding as never happened. But the reality is that it happened and by accepting it little by little, it is becoming more OK to have small conversations about it. Even though I consider myself an introvert for the most part and I really do not like conflict, I have learned that there are things that require proper confrontation and to be talked about in order to remain healthy and stable. 

WC:371

References:

Amelie (2022) Avoiding conflict management style: Pros, cons, examples, MT Copeland. Available at: https://mtcopeland.com/blog/what-is-the-avoiding-conflict-management-style-when-should-you-use-it/ (Accessed: February 15, 2023). 

Eilerman, D. (2006, September 18). The use and misuse of an avoiding style in conflict management. Mediate.com. Retrieved February 15, 2023, from https://mediate.com/the-use-and-misuse-of-an-avoiding-style-in-conflict-management/