The essay is from 4th grade and has to be brought up to 8th-grade level based on the assignment requirements and the rubric. For example, use more vivid language. The essay will need to contain around

The essay is from 4th grade and has to be brought up to 8th-grade level based on the assignment requirements and the rubric. For example, use more vivid language. The essay will need to contain around
English | Assignment | Autobiographical Incident Essay Assignment Autobiographical Incident Essay Write the final draft of your autobiographical incident about a memorable event. Describe an experience that was important because of the reasons you acted as you did, the actions you chose to take, or the consequences of your actions. Your draft should be 500–750 words. Make sure you have used First-person point of view. Chronological order. Vivid, descriptive language that shows and dialogue. A conclusion that summarizes or reflects on the event or experience Make sure your final draft demonstrates revisions. Review the rubric so you understand how this assignment will be graded. © 2020 K12 Inc. All rights reserved. Page 1 of 1Copying or distributing without K12’s written consent is prohibited.
The essay is from 4th grade and has to be brought up to 8th-grade level based on the assignment requirements and the rubric. For example, use more vivid language. The essay will need to contain around
English | Rubric | Assignment | Autobiographical Incident Essay (35 points) Rubric Assignment: Autobiographical Incident Essay (35 points) Criterion Exemplary (31-35 points) Proficient (26-30 points) Emerging (21-25 points) Not Evident (below 21 points) Score and Comments Autobiographical Incident Essay Write an autobiographical incident essay about a memorable event that was important because reasons, actions, or consequences, summarizing and reflecting on events, experiences, or character/s while wrapping up the story. Points Possible: 8 Student submits a 500–750 word autobiographical incident essay with clear characters, setting, plot, and purpose. Incident is memorable due to the reasons, actions, or consequences. Essay clearly summarizes or reflects on the experiences or events revealing a life lesson or important event. Student submits a 500–750 word autobiographical incident essay with clear characters, setting, plot, and purpose. Incident is memorable but lacks some connection to the reasons, actions, or consequences. Essay summarizes or reflects on the experiences or events revealing a life lesson or important event. Student submits a 500–750 word autobiographical incident essay with clear characters, setting, plot, and purpose. Incident is somewhat memorable but lacks some connection to the reasons, actions, or consequences. Essay summarizes or reflects on the experiences or events without clearly revealing a life lesson or important event. Student submission does not meet requirement for length and does not contain one or more of the elements: characters, setting, plot, or purpose. Incident is not portrayed as memorable or lacks connection to reasons, actions, or consequences. Essay contains little summary or reflection. Score: Comments: Dialogue Use language that shows and dialogue Points Possible: 6 Essay uses colorful dialogue to effectively reveal character and to move the plot forward. Essay uses dialogue to reveal character and to move the plot forward. Essay attempts to use dialogue to reveal character and to move the plot forward. Essay does not use dialogue, or dialogue is ineffective. Score: Comments: Imagery Points Possible: 6 Essay uses vivid sensory imagery to establish a clear mood. Essay uses imagery to establish a mood. Essay attempts to use imagery to establish a mood. Essay does not use sensory imagery to establish a mood. Score: Comments: Point of View Use first-person point of view. Points Possible: 4 Essay maintains consistent first-person point of view. Essay maintains mostly consistent first-person point of view. Essay maintains somewhat consistent first-person point of view. Essay does not maintain consistent first-person point of view. Score: Comments: Organization Use chronological order. Points Possible: 3 Essay uses chronological order to effectively construct an autobiographical incident. Essay uses chronological order to construct an autobiographical incident. Essay attempts to use chronological order to effectively construct an autobiographical incident. Essay does not use chronological order to effectively construct an autobiographical incident. Score: Comments: Revisions Correct sentences containing wordiness or redundancy. Points Possible: 5 Essay demonstrates significant revisions resulting in a more coherent, unified paper that clearly depicts an autobiographical incident. Essay demonstrates revisions resulting in a more coherent, unified paper that depicts an autobiographical incident. Essay demonstrates some revisions resulting in a paper that depicts an autobiographical incident. Essay demonstrates little or no revision. Score: Comments: Mechanics/Conventions Points Possible: 3 Essay is free of grammatical or spelling errors. Essay has three or fewer errors in grammar or spelling. Errors do not interfere with understanding. Essay has 4–8 grammatical and spelling errors. Errors interfere with understanding. Essay has more than eight grammatical and spelling errors. Errors interfere with understanding. Score: Comments: Student Name: Total Score: © 2020 K12 Inc. All rights reserved. Page 2 of 2Copying or distributing without K12’s written consent is prohibited.
The essay is from 4th grade and has to be brought up to 8th-grade level based on the assignment requirements and the rubric. For example, use more vivid language. The essay will need to contain around
My Pet Bird’s Escape It finally stopped raining and the sun showed up outside, making all of nature happy. Flowers were blooming, birds were chirping and my pet bird Timmy was chirping too. It made me sad that he was locked in the cage while all the wild birds were outside flying free and enjoying this nice spring day. I decided to let Timmy out of his cage to at least fly around my house a little bit, because he could not enjoy the outdoors like wild birds. Unfortunately, I did not see that my mother opened one of the windows in the house, and Timmy flew out into the neighborhood. I got very scared when I saw that he flew out, because I knew he cannot survive outside on his own. “Mom, help,” I cried loudly, while standing next to the open window in the sunroom. “What is it, honey?” my mom asked me while running from the living room. “Timmy… Timmy escaped, and it is all my fault!” I said while crying. “Oh no, I am sorry. Please try to calm down. We will find him and bring him home,” said my mom in a soft voice, trying to calm me down. “But what if we do not? Timmy is a tropical bird and it is cold outside. I am worried mom. I am so worried about him, mom!” I was crying and shaking. “Honey, please calm down. Here, let me give you a hug. Let us both calm down, so we can think clearly. We will find our little bird and bring him home, you will see!” Mom was speaking softly while trying to comfort me. “OK,” I said while hugging my mom. Hugging my mom helped me calm down almost instantly and I was already thinking more clearly. “Mom, I know what, I will bring his favorite toy bell outside and start ringing it while calling his name!” I shouted. “Yes honey, that is a wonderful idea,” replied mom excitedly. We got the bell from the birdcage and ran outside. Immediately, I went outside and started calling his name. “Timmy, Timmy!” He did not come. The more I called his name, the more I heard other wild birds chirping louder, almost like they were trying to tell me something, but I could not understand what. I decided to rely on my eyes and my brain more than my ears, and I started looking around for him. I remembered that birds loved to come to my garden and rest on the tree there. I ran to the garden and there he was, my bird Timmy, sitting high on the tree branch. I called his name, but he did not move. I could not reach him, because he was too high up. Then I got an idea on how to get him to come to me. I ran into the house and got his favorite treat, spray millet. I took it outside and showed it to him. Right after he saw it, he flew on my hand and started eating. I quickly grabbed him and took him inside, and put him back in his cage. Timmy was shaking and I could see that he was very stressed by this whole adventure. Both my mom and me were really happy and relieved that Timmy was safe again. Now I always think to make sure no windows are open before letting my bird out of his cage. Add conclusion